September is one of my most favourite months of the year and I feel it's a good time to reflect. The change of the season is palpable - with the nights getting longer and the sun rise happening just a little later every day. With the autumn equinox on the 23rd of September (in the UK) the shift in season is clearly marked. At this particular moment, the sun crosses the celestial equator; and the Earth's rotational axis is neither tilted away from nor towards the sun. For me, it's a moment of stillness and contemplation, especially given the tumultuous energies during 2018 and especially during the last three months.
 
Reflecting on the year so far, I've been very interested in the more widely observed patterns and the collective energy. What is emerging across the board? What are the energies that are moving through us? Words that have sprung to mind and have been reflected back to me by various people are: re-calibration, reset, reboot, major shifts. I feel that there is a deep dismantling of the old, especially long-term relationships, both intimate and business, including organisations and communities. For myself, I have had two major changes this year - related to my training as a body psychotherapist and to business - and in both instances, it was out of my hands and I was presented with the changes; i.e. it was out of my control and that is not an easy place for me to be in. My task has been to feel all there is to feel with regards to the changes, such as the hurt, grief, anger and betrayal, but staying away from blaming, including blaming myself, or needing to do something about it. My intent throughout this quite difficult time has been to stay vulnerable, to stay open and to trust the process - that out of the chaos and the dismantling something beautiful and very different can emerge, which would not have been possible in the old structures. It's also a great opportunity for healing the deeper places inside of me and to invite different energies into my life, such as lightness, space and excitement.
 
If you are also in the midst of some fundamental and what might seem very destructive changes, trust the process. Trust that we are exactly where we meant to be and that the dismantling and collapsing of our lives and relationships is part of the process of creating something new, exciting and beautiful - with more vibrancy.

I went skiing over Christmas and New Year with my family. My parents generously paid for a private session for my husband, but on the day, he did not feel up to it; he definitely has a bit of a love/hate relationship to this somewhat unnatural activity. I decided to take the lesson myself and just loved it. However, it was interesting to see that my patterns not only show up in general life and while I'm doing yoga, but also in my skiing!

The instructor said to me: "Sandra, let the snow take you somewhere. You are cutting the corners short." What the instructor meant was that I needed to go with the snow and allow myself to be taken somewhere rather than forcing my skis into a certain position in order to control where I'm going. He wanted me to work with the snow, not against it. I know this lesson; it's not something new, but it is incredible to think that a skiing instructor, who I had known for less than hour, picked up on my deep-rooted patterns just like that!

What I took away from it: Allowing myself to be taken somewhere by life - maybe even somewhere new - instead of needing to plan and control everything and thereby getting incredibly exhausted. This does not negate my sense of agency and the power of my influence and self-determination. It reminds me, however, that life is a co-creation and not a solo act.
 
Let the snow take you somewhere and notice how that feels.
Walk and maybe even ski in beauty.